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What Not to Say to Someone With Alzheimer’s

If your loved one has Alzheimer's, how do you talk to them? It helps to avoid specific topics. Find Alzheimer's Care in Litchfield Park, AZ.
Alzheimer's Care Litchfield Park
Alzheimer’s Care Litchfield Park

When your senior parent has Alzheimer’s, it’s hard to know the best way to handle situations. As their dementia progresses, those situations can get more complicated. Often family caregivers are left to try different approaches to find out what works best with their senior parents. Alzheimer’s care can be an excellent resource for families because an Alzheimer’s care provider can help you learn new ways to approach the common issues people face when a loved one has Alzheimer’s. Sometimes you can’t avoid saying the wrong thing, but sometimes you can. Avoid saying these things to your senior loved one with Alzheimer’s:

That Person Passed Away

If the person is at the point in their dementia where they can’t retain information, you shouldn’t tell them that someone they love has passed away. If you tell them their spouse, sibling, or parent, is gone, they will be hurt, sad, and upset. To them, it will feel like the initial shock of grief and sadness all over again. Then they will forget and experience that grief again when they ask a few hours later. In such a case, you should deflect your senior parent onto a new topic after saying that person isn’t there.

You Just Did That

If your senior loved one wants to go for a walk, listen to a CD, or do some activity they just recently did, never remind them that they already did that. If you tell them that they recently did that thing and didn’t remember doing it, it could scare them because they don’t remember. Just do the activity again if possible. If not, then deflect them into a new activity, so they don’t think about the one they just did.

Don’t You Remember?

Looking through photo books is an excellent pastime for seniors with Alzheimer’s, but when looking at old photos, remember that your senior loved one may think those times are the present moment. They may not recognize people in the photos or remember visiting those places. Asking them, “don’t you remember doing this?” or “Don’t you remember that cabin we always rent on the lake in the summer?” can distress them because they won’t remember, and they will feel disoriented and out of place when they can’t remember those times. They also may feel anxious because they feel like they are letting you down if they don’t remember.

Don’t You Know Who I Am?

It is emotionally challenging when your senior parent with Alzheimer’s no longer recognizes you. But you should never ask them if they remember who you are. They may not know your name, but they recognize that you are someone important to them, and they will be sad and anxious when they can’t remember your name. Instead, it would help if you introduced yourself so they could remember you. Tell them that you are their child and say your name.

If you or an aging loved one are considering hiring Alzheimer’s Care in Litchfield Park, AZ, please contact the caring staff at Blessings for Seniors Companion Care at (623) 594-0819.

Jack Coito

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